Asper-what??

Seems like recently we have had a lot of questions from folks about Logan’s diagnosis of having Aspergers Syndrome. What exactly is it? And what is it not? So we’ve decided to take this opportunity to let our friends and family members understand a little bit more about how Logan “ticks”.

Aspergers is on what is called “The Autism Spectrum”. There is a VERY wide range of disorders on this spectrum, as well as a level of functioning for each disorder that is from very high to severely low. Aspergers is related to autism, but has some distinct differences. Obviously Logan is on the “high-functioning” end of things.

We knew from an early age that something was a little “off” with Logan. Between the ages of 18 months and 2 years, I noticed that he would usually sort or arrange his blocks, not build with them. He also picked up information at a rate that I thought was really fast. At 18 months he knew every letter and sound of the alphabet, recognizing them independently. He could count to 20, knew all his shapes, colors, etc. Not incredibly unusual, but still curious. At this age he had what we called “little robot or professor talk”. He spoke very “correctly”. His speech was distinct. Over time this has worn off to some degree.

For years he rarely cried when he was hurt. We never knew when he had an ear infection, because he never cried from pain. He hardly made a peep during all the months of his hand burns, changing bandages, and skin graft surgeries when he was 18 months old. As the years have passed, he has “learned” to cry when he gets hurt. He also has very little, if any, sense of danger.

Many aspergers kids have sensory issues. Logan has always been OK as far as eating and textures. But he is very picky about how things feel on his body. He refuses to wear buttons, or things that he thinks itch. One day I found him literally eating TONS of food. The counter was covered with boxes and packages of food. When I asked him what he was doing—he said, “I’m eating a lot so I will be ready to hibernate for the winter.” When I told him people can’t hibernate, he burst into tears and started carrying on about “I don’t want winter to come because I don’t want to wear that scratchy jacket!!!” He also has a very sensitive sense of smell.

For a couple of years he would literally freak out if we took a different route to Wal-Mart. When he was in the developmental preschool he rode the bus to school. If he was crying when they dropped him off, it was usually because a child had been absent, so the bus driver took a different route home. Nothing gigantic, just a handful of things that seemed “off” or a bit “over the top”. At age three we had him see a child psychologist to get an idea of what was going on with him. At this time they did an IQ test and he scored at the genius level. He learned to play chess at age four.

At age three his developmental preschool teacher very cautiously mentioned to us that she saw signs of autism in Logan, and thought we ought to look in to it. So what did all of this eventually lead to? A diagnosis of Aspergers Syndrome. When we read more about what that is, it made COMPLETE sense to us. It is a neurocognitive disorder that affects many areas of functioning. A big one being that he does not understand the rules of society, especially if they are not obvious—and not always when they are. He learns facts. He does not “take in” what is happening around him that involves the rest of the world, only what directly impacts him. He will rarely consider someone else’s point of view.

He experiences anxiety, and rules help calm that anxiety. His anxiety can occur for the smallest reason—and often not a very logical one. Children who experience anxiety often manage it with obsessive behaviors. Logan has had obvious and not-so-obvious behaviors that he does repeatedly during different situations.

One mistake people make is in thinking that because of Logan’s high intellectual ability, that he understands how the world works. We were often frustrated with Logan’s behaviors because we couldn’t understand why he would or wouldn’t do such obvious things. Now we understand that nothing is obvious to him, especially social behaviors. If he is taught exactly how to react, what to do and say in a specific situation, he will do it from then on. But he almost needs to be told how to respond to every situation—which will take a lifetime. He will likely never have the ability to read emotional cues and respond accordingly, unless it is a cue he has been taught how to recognize and respond to.

Some behaviors that all children do to some extent, but that Aspergers kids do much more often and with more intensity are: reacting poorly to new events, transitions, and changes. In new places Logan is extremely hyper and has a hard time calming himself. This is not ADD or ADHD. He feels and exhibits anxiety. We were recently at Applebee’s for dinner. Logan was visibly anxious and on overload with the smells, noise of the TV’s and people, and the dim, odd lights. He thought it was a great time. He doesn’t exactly know he is anxious. In this case he was unusually quiet because so many senses were on overload. He is easily overwhelmed and often has “meltdowns” and tantrums like a three year old would. He will cry and carry on in front of peers, with no natural embarrassment. He has a hard time holding back the tears and emotions when he looses a game…any game...anywhere…with anyone. Socially he is just starting to imitate others to do “regular little boy” playing like sword fighting, etc. It has never come naturally to him. And even now when he does attempt to play make-believe in that way, he copies exactly what he has heard someone else say. He will often display a good deal of silly behaviors because he does not know what to do in a situation.

Everything is very literal to children with Aspergers. Logan does not understand very much humor, and cannot grasp sarcasm. We have learned to be very careful about what we say—because he will hold us to it. He remembers details and events that seem very odd. He has an extremely good memory. He has a hard time telling a lie.

Logan will often need extra time to respond to your questions and comments. Actually, most comments he won’t respond to, unless he knows to do so. His thoughts are often interrupted by other thoughts and he can completely change directions in his conversations. Or make comments that seem completely unrelated, but that were triggered in his mind and changed his current thoughts. He rarely makes eye contact, especially in direct conversations. We have learned that forcing him to make eye contact can actually break his concentration and make it even harder for him to concentrate on what we are saying. He is trying so hard to look at us, that he can’t listen to us. We still try to make him do it—bad habit.

Logan is often distracted by sounds. We have walked into Wal-Mart and he will put his hands on his ears and say how loud it is. We have also been in a store and he will ask, “mom, what is that sound?” There are dozens of sounds in a store—it could be any one of them. It is usually an air-conditioner, or something that is repeating over and over. It is so funny when he tries to imitate the sound so I can figure out what he is talking about. But even with his sensitivity to noises and sounds, he is not able to whisper or speak in a quiet voice for more than a few words. He is a very loud child. He also often has many thoughts in his head at once. Last year he told me several times, “mom, I think about too many things. I don’t want to think about so many things.” I’d ask him what he was thinking about and he had a list of things, including things like, “remember in the Barney show when BJ did ___. And that time we were getting a haircut and Daddy had on the red shirt. And that song that goes ___.” And on and on.

Darin recently finished a book called, “Ten things every child with autism wishes you knew.” Logan is not autistic, but has many of the same characteristics of a high-functioning autistic child. Darin was amazed at how well the book described Logan. It is difficult to explain Logan’s challenges. He appears normal in every way to many people. It is hard when people make comments about him “seeming perfectly normal” with the undertones of…”there is nothing wrong with him, you guys are just paranoid.” At times I think I feel compelled to explain his diagnosis to justify his behaviors. Something I need to get over. He is just Logan. I have so, so, so appreciated our ward, neighborhood and community loving and accepting Logan. They are non-judgmental and supportive of me in my trying to parent Logan as best as I can. Folks truly love and care about Logan. They know who he is and are not annoyed by him. It has been a huge blessing in our lives to live in this area and feel support with Logan. They say the greatest gift you can give a mother is to love her child. THANK YOU!!!

P.S. Most people with Aspergers Syndrome are very successful in life, due in part to their high intelligence. Some famous people that have been diagnosed with Aspergers are Robin Williams, Bill Gates, Satoshi Tajiri (creator of Pokemon), Dan Aykroyd, and John Denver. Some that are thought to probably have had Aspergers (from their history of behaviors) are Emily Dickinson, Albert Einstein, Isaac Newton, Benjamin Franklin, and Leonardo DaVinvi.